February is the Saddest Month

Has it really been 4 years since Steve left us? It's painful to think that this is what it means to lose someone. That the years pass and they aren't ever coming back. Mortality means finality.

I was listening to my itunes this evening and the Neil Diamond song I Am...I Said came on. I never really listened to the words before. When we were kids Steve was a Neil Diamond fan which I never "got". Listening to the song made me think of him and why he might have been drawn to the music. Then it struck me that it was February the time of year when Steve checked out for good. Four years past.

I am, I
said
To no one there
And no one heard at all
Not
even the chair
I am, I cried
I am, said I
And I
am lost, and I can't even say why

I am, I
said
I am, I cried
I am...